Do you know the Muffin Man?
by CSIslave
Summary: Greggo plays some tricks on Sara... short, sweet and complete
1. Evil little mind games

A/N: Okay, this will probably be the only chapter in this story unless people request more. Sara/Greg. Tell me what you think!

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"Hey Sara, I got those results for you," Greg called down the hall in a singsong voice. Several lab techs all shouted his name angrily. "Geez… grumpy," he mumbled, walking towards Sara, who was getting a drink from the water fountain. She wiped her mouth and looked up at Greg.

"Can't you go through a day without disturbing people? I think today you've set your record; ten minutes!" She laughed and Greg knew she was teasing, but he decided to ham it up a bit. He bit his lip and widened his eyes. Sara looked shocked, and he looked away, pretending to wipe his eyes.

"Hey, Greg! I was kidding around." Saras' voice was filled with concern. Greg slumped to the ground, trying to disguise his laughs as sobs. Sara knelt worriedly. Greg lifted his head slowly and in one swift motion, pushed Sara to the ground and jumped away, grinning mischievously at her. Sara looked up in shock and Greg automatically felt bad.

"Sara, are you okay? I was just playing around!" Sara struggled to get up.

"Help me up Greg… I think I twisted my ankle." Greg quickly grabbed her arm and found himself in her tight grip, and then flying over her shoulder. Landing heavily on the ground, Greg looked up at Sara, who was standing and brushing herself off.

"Payback," she said simply, winking slightly at Greg.

"Yeah, yeah…" he stood and pulled out the papers. "I have your results."

"Well, let me have them."

"First, I have to ask you a question."

"Alright…"

"Do you promise to answer seriously?"

"Yes."

"Really?"

"Greg! I need my results."

"Fine, fine." Greg looked around and then lowered his voice to a whisper.

"Do you know the muffin man?"

"Excuse me?"

"The muffin man."

"The muffin man?"

"Do you know the muffin man who lives on-"

"Greg! I thought it was a serious question."

"It is! He totally ripped me off when I bought a load of bread from him and now he's hiding from me."

"Gimme my results!"

"Well… first you need to do something for me."

"What is that?" Sara looked annoyed, but curious. Greg looked behind her and saw Archie give him a thumbs-up.

"You need to kiss me."

"Greg… I hope you're kidding."

"Nope. We're both on break, so you can't gripe at me for taking up work time… one smakaroo on the cheek. No on will ever know." He grinned at Sara. She searched his face for a joke, but found none. Sighing, she leaned in and quickly kissed him on the cheek. Greg smiled happily and she grabbed her results. Greg looked again at Archie, who smiled and nodded. Greg skipped happily down the hall.

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Grissom stood by Archie's computer, waiting for Sara to get off of break. He was on break as well, but it never hurt to work during your free time. Sara dashed in while they still had a few moments to spare. They both looked at the screen and Archie tapped a few keys on the computer.

"Oh my gosh! What is this?" Archie exclaimed, obviously not shocked at all. A white screen came onto the computer. Bold text scrolled across it.

GRISSOM- SARA IS MINE!

Sara felt her jaw drop as her boss watched, showing no emotion on his face. A video started and it showed Sara supposedly hugging Greg; she knew better and recognized the scene from when she had grabbed Greg to throw him to the ground. Then it went to a close up on Saras' and Gregs' faces and Sara winking at him. She stared in disbelief. _Oh god, please no…_ but the next shot was of Sara kissing Greg on the cheek, and then winking again. It was the same wink as before, but someone had altered the video to make the hug, wink, kiss, and wink look like one shot. She turned and glared at Archie.

"What? I didn't do it!" She turned back in time to see the words:

_Video taken and produced by Archie._

The screen went back to white and more words came across the screen:

_Much love Sara; don't hurt me too bad!_

Grinding her teeth, Sara stormed off to the lab, fists already balled at her side. Grissom looked to Archie, who just shrugged.

"Is she gone?" Greg asked, crawling out from under Archies' desk. Archie grinned and nodded.

"Do you have what you promised me?" Greg sighed and pulled out a pot of his Blue Hawaiian coffee. Archie took it and poured them two cups.

"Cheers, Grissom!" Greg said cheerily and he drank.

Grissom just stared.

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A/N: Hee hee… I just liked the idea and thought I'd play around with it… tell me what you think!


	2. Revenge is Sweet

A/N: Wowsers! I got a lot of good response quick, so I will continue with this! Thanks so much to all who reviewed! But this will DEFINATLEY be the last chapter!

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"Greg Sanders!" Sara seethed, kicking open the door to the lab where Greg usually worked. Warrick was there, waiting for Greg to get back.

"Sara… are you okay?"

"Warrick, will you help me get back at Greg? He made a tape of him and me kissing and stuff… I wouldn't do that… well, I did, otherwise he wouldn't have been able to make the tape… but I didn't mean anything by it! And he showed it to Grissom!" Warrick smiled.

"So I suppose he's not coming back here any time soon? I guess not… let's go."

"I was thinking we could steal his coffee!"

"Doesn't he keep that downstairs?"

"Yeah, let's go!" Sara charge out of the room, Warrick running behind her. She jumped down the stairs, skipping as many as she could.

"Whoa!" she heard Warrick shout. She turned in time to see him come flying towards her. They rolled down the remainder of the stairs and when they stopped, Sara was on top of Warrick. She looked down at him in shock.

"Hee hee…" She looked at the top of the stairs and saw Greg standing with something in his hands.

"Greg! I'm going to kill you!" Sara yelled, storming up the stairs and leaving Warrick in a heap at the bottom. When she got to the top, Greg was gone. There was a sticky note.

_Find Nick_

Sara looked around the hall and saw Nick walking away from her with a sticky note attached to his back.

"Nick!" Sara called, reaching out to grab him. He whirled quickly and Sara put her hands our to stop a collision. The result was her hands resting oh his chest and him looking at her quizzically. Sighing, Sara reached behind him and grabbed the sticky note off of his back.

"You all right there, Sara?"

"I'm fine," Sara said, distracted.

_Go see Brass_

Growling, Sara ran to Brass's office. "Brass!" She called. She slammed open his door and tried to go to him, but ended up tripping over the rug and flying onto his desk with her head in his lap. Brass cleared his throat uncomfortably as Sara lifted her head. Smiling weakly and shrugging her shoulders, Sara looked up. Greg was outside the window, waving at her. Shrieking furiously, Sara got up and ran into the hall. Greg ran into Archie's room and locked the door behind him. Sara pounded on the door as Greg blew her a kiss. She smiled sarcastically and flipped him off.

"Sara?" She turned and saw Grissom walking towards her, one eyebrow raised. Panicky and nervous from Gregs' teasing, she flung her arms around Grissom's neck.

"I think Greg is trying to kill me!" Grissom, shocked, patted her back stiffly. They both looked at Greg, who was grinning wickedly and exclaiming to Archie, who was laughing and nodding enthusiastically. All Sara could do was wait for the fresh hell…

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It came soon enough.

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Greg had told Grissom about a report on CNN, so everyone was gathered in the break room; Grissom had given Sara strict orders not to kill Greg during work, even though they were all there after their shifts to see the report together. Greg walked in and Sara snarled at him. He smiled and turned on the TV. Sara watched as someone who looked familiar started to give a report.

_Welcome to CNN; tonight we have a shocking report about one of Las Vegas' own criminalists. Several people have reported that Sara Sidle is in the job only for the men. A young man in the crime lab took this video._

Everyone watched, shocked, as Sara was seen kissing Greg. It got worse as it showed her on top of Warrick. Warrick whimpered a little. The screen then showed Sara touching Nicks' chest and reaching behind him. Sara felt like dying on the spot. Then, as the grand finale, it showed Sara hugging Grissom. The shot backed up and replayed in slow motion. Then it showed the reporter again. On the screen, 'the reporter' pulled off his fake beard and glasses and walked right up to the camera.

"You can't get me in trouble, Grissom, cause we're not on the clock!" Greg waved cheerily from the screen at the watching CSI's. "I lurve you Sara!" He kissed the screen and the shot turned to black. They all stared in disbelief as the tape ejected itself from the TV.

"GREG!" Everyone yelled, turning to glare venomously at the lab tech. However, Greg was already gone. Sara felt like punching something, and she was sure as hell hoping it would be Greg. Everyone looked furious except Grissom, who was smiling slightly.

"What do you have to smile about, Grissom?"

"Who feels like pulling a little overtime together?" Everyone listened as Grissom told them about his plan.

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_THREE HOURS LATER_

"Shh!"

"Be quite, you'll wake him up!"

"Isn't this illegal?

"Be QUIET, Warrick!"

Sara, Grissom, Nick and Warrick were all sneaking around the bushes next to Gregs' house. Warrick dashed forward with a paperclip. The other CSIs' waited in hiding as he picked the lock. The door opened silently, and everyone dashed forward. It wasn't hard to find what they were looking for: they grabbed all that they could find and snuck back out, locking the door behind them.

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_THE NEXT SHIFT_

Greg ran into work, his breathing ragged and his eyes blood-shot. He dashed into the break room, where everyone else was sitting, sipping on coffee. There were about a hundred empty cups littering the ground and they were each sipping on a cup.

"What… are you guys drinking that is so good you've had over 20 cups each?"

"Well, you hooked us onto it, actually Greggo." He looked behind them and saw him empty bags of Blue Hawaiian coffee.

"You guys stole my coffee! That's 40$ a pound!"

"I know, and totally worth it!" Smiling, Sara raised her cup. "Cheers!" Greg ran out of the break room, blubbering incoherently. Sara laughed out loud and touched cups with Grissom.

"Revenge is sweet."


End file.
